Recently, I witnessed one example of the few, and I mean FEW, benefits of social media.
I cleaned up online stuff recently. Got rid of a bunch of groups that no longer serve me.
As I was about to part with my "Aging Horsewomen" FB group (ouch, painful), I reflected on how important the group had been for decades. This was where I turned to regularly and found inspiration, information, validation, support, and encouragement.
January 16 was a year since Dusty left the earth. Missing his hugs and everything about his sweet soul left a big hole.
I wrote a goodbye post, copied and pasted to follow, mainly for my personal benefit. It got over 1000 likes, and I lost track of how many supportive comments it received. It was an expression of my gratitude and hope for others like me in what can be a difficult time.
The group has 69K members. SIXTY-NINE THOUSAND!!
Rarely did I see nasty, disparaging rhetoric- unheard of in a group that large. And if you know horsewomen, that's practically a MIRACLE! (Funny, but 1000% true...)
I have tremendous gratitude for the women in that "crazy horsewomen tribe" and for how welcoming and safe that platform was for me to turn to.
This is the upside of social media. Uplifting, positive, community-enhancing, heart-bridge-building across miles and screens. Those are its only redeeming qualities.
You can't find much else that's beneficial. There are no real "truths" to be found. Barely, anyway. You look one thing up and find an opposing view that's validated just as strongly. Cue the chaotic confusion......
Bullies, convoluted info, babbling, attention-addicted, phony, shallow, lost, brokenness everywhere. Dressed up in shiny, pretty, flashy packages.
It's a different world for my generation.
One that drove me to the beach, for sanity's sake.
In a world that often seems to be spinning out of control to who knows where it's imperative to find the positive and anchor in it.
I'm grateful for my journey's pitfalls and peaks because it led me back to my faith. But I still need to keep returning to things that give hope and light, like gratitude, over and over again.
RIP Dusty Do. A year of galloping through heaven....til we meet again.
Copy of post.....
I know this isn't necessary, but I wanted to take a moment to post in this group and thank everyone as I'll be taking a long break indefinitely. And maybe offer comfort for anyone else in my position.
This group was pivotal to my mental state of health, among a million other things, as an aging horsewoman for years.
In 2021 we sold our farm because of COVID job loss. We moved to Florida with expectations of reaping fruits of our labor, and instead, basically lost my horses and had a second major riding accident that took the better part of a year to "heal" from. I am still dealing with issues to this day due to the injuries sustained.
I basically found myself in a position I never expected to be, especially so soon. I decided I needed to close the horse-focused chapter of my life.
Perhaps not forever, but who knows.
I am fine and have peace with the decision.
It took some doing, though. Took a lot of processing. Major soul searching. Horses had been my identity and my everything from age of six. And though I still love them, feel them in my blood, and carry their spirits in my heart, important facts became apparent, warranting the need to close the chapter.
Not all of this can be explained for others to understand. But it's what my soul is telling me.
I'm still healing from all the losses and need to take some time away. It's still hard to think of my last senior, Dusty, whom I lost a year ago. I can't even drive by horses without tearing up. The bitterness that still lingers for having to leave my farm can have a negative effect on my wellbeing at times.
That bitterness needs to dissipate. The pain needs to heal some more.
I am over the moon seeing others enjoy their horse-bonds and horse-worlds. But the remaining pain makes being around something I loved to be around hard to be around. If that makes sense.
It makes sense for me, and I suppose that's all that matters. It's gotten MUCH better and will keep getting better, but I need time to focus on the final parts of healing.
I wish all my fellow aging horsewomen the most beautiful rides off into their futures. I have immense gratitude for the friends I made here and the support that was boundless.
Perhaps someday I will be back in the saddle, but if it doesn't work out that way, I am good. I can look back at all the beautiful gifts I had when I was a horsewoman with incredible gratitude.
Much gratitude to everyone whoever offered and olive branch or a kind word.
One of the last pics of me and my sweet Dusty before he left this earth.
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